


And I Said Who Are You Thinking Of

by orphan_account



Category: Glee
Genre: Locker Room, M/M, Manhandling, Slash, envy issues, porrrrnypornyporn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-24
Updated: 2009-12-24
Packaged: 2017-10-05 06:14:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/38617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Puck's sick of everybody liking Finn better.</p>
            </blockquote>





	And I Said Who Are You Thinking Of

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pixienotes (bsafemydeers)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bsafemydeers/gifts).



> Sort of a coda to 1x08 :)

"Hey."

Puck looked up to see Kurt standing in the doorway of the locker room. All of the other guys were long gone, but Puck had caught a sneak slushie and come back for a second shower.

"You're not joining the team again, are you?" he asked, sceptical.

"Oh no no no," said Kurt. "I mean don't get me wrong, it was fun, my dad liked it, and the eye candy? Whoo."

Puck glared at him.

"But!" Kurt continued hurriedly, walking to his locker. "It is _probably_ in my best interests and those of my currently unbroken limbs to pledge allegiance to my true team from now on. I was just getting my stuff." He opened the locker and pulled out a fancy looking gym bag, probably from dolchee or whatever, if they even made gym bags.

"Yeah," said Puck. "That's probably for the best. You were only hanging around to perve on Finn anyway." He slammed his own locker shut with a sneer.

"Whoah -- that is not -- I was -- what's your problem with Finn, anyway?" Kurt spluttered.

"My problem?" Puck snapped. "My problem is that everyone always fucking _loves_ that guy! What does he have that I don't?"

"Well," Kurt said dreamily. "He has the nicest eyes. And the way he smiles-"

"_I wasn't asking to hear your stupid gay fantasies about Finn_," Puck growled, shoving Kurt back against the locker.

"Hey!" Kurt grabbed at his shirt. "Don't manhandle me, you… you… you big _langrel_!"

"I'll manhandle whoever I damn well want!" Puck snarled. He was suddenly aware of the tiny space between them, and the way Kurt was looking up at him, wide-eyed. Then, and he'll never know what in the universe possessed him to do it, but he leaned forward and bit Kurt on the lip.

Then they were kissing furiously, grinding up against one another. He dragged Kurt further up the wall as Kurt shoved his hands under Puck's shirt. Puck had the feeling that this situation was rapidly spiralling out of his control. Somehow he couldn't work up the appropriate disgust for the fact that he was _making out with a dude what the hell_ with Kurt's hot mouth beneath his, hands on his skin, solid body pressed against him. He'd never been one to turn down sex anyway.

"Oh my god," Kurt almost-moaned.

"Shut up!" Puck muttered into his mouth.

Kurt wrapped his legs around Puck's waist. "I really want to suck your cock right now," he blurted out, dropping his head to lean on Puck's shoulder. And, well, that wasn't something he'd heard before! Except from Mrs Waits down on Ferris street, now he came to think of it, but she didn't count because her teeth scared him.

"Damn right you do," he growled, snaking a hand into Kurt's hair and pulling his head back so he had to look at Puck. "And you're _not_," he snarled, punctuating every phrase with a thrust of his hips against Kurt's. "You're _not_ going to be thinking of _Finn_ while you do it, _are you_?"

"Jesusfuckno," breathed Kurt, digging his fingernails into Puck's back. Then he shuddered and slumped back against the wall.

"That's… right," Puck panted. He had time to grind up against Kurt's lolling form twice more before the kid opened his eyes and said "No, but seriously," before shoving Puck away slightly and sinking fluidly to his knees.

"Whoah," said Puck. Kurt started to undo his belt. "You've never done this before, right?"

"I've read up on the theory," Kurt said smugly, grinning up at him as he pulled the zipper down. "It shouldn't be too… uh…" he trailed off.

Puck had the presence of mind to smirk. "Was _hard_ the word you were looking for?"

"Abso_lute_ly," Kurt said fervently, and went down.

Puck had to admit he wasn't bad for a newbie. Sloppy but enthusiastic. Plus, they'd been humping for like ten minutes, so he was on the edge anyway. At this angle he could almost pretend it was a chick sucking him off – Kurt was definitely not blonde, but… and then Kurt looked up at him, mouth wrapped around at least half of Puck's (impressive if he did say so himself) dick, and the tiniest self-satisfied look in his eyes. He didn't look like he was lying back and thinking of Finn. That was more than he could have said for Rachel, if they'd ever got this far.

Then Kurt pulled off.

"Hey!" said Puck indignantly.

"Sorry, there's this thing I read about that I wanted to try-"

"You're not going _anywhere near_ my ass-"

"No, no!" Kurt said breathlessly. "It was like…"

And then he did something with his tongue that had Puck's eyes practically rolling back in his head. When he stopped seeing stars, Kurt was up and leaning over the sink, wiping his mouth fastidiously.

"That'll take some getting used to," he said, wrinkling his nose.

Then they both stood there and stared at each other for a moment.

"You don't have to gaybash me now, do you?" Kurt asked, raising an eyebrow.

Puck rolled his eyes. "It's probably in the football rulebook or something, but I'm gonna go with _this never happened_, yeah?"

"Right. Got it." Kurt grabbed his bag and said "I'm gonna… yeah," waving a hand at his pants.

"Right," said Puck, zipping up and heading for the door. "You do that."

"And Puck!" called Kurt.

"What?" he snapped, turning around in the doorway.

"I _really_ wasn't thinking of Finn," said Kurt, smirking ever so slightly.

Puck rolled his eyes, but he was smiling as he walked away.


End file.
